Lets discuss the idea of expectations versus reality. For me exercise and fitness is a lifestyle, not a hobby, not a binge indulgence I hide in the top draw or a false façade I throw out in conversation to impress people about how far I can run or how high I can jump.
Exercise and well- being is a part of my day to day routine but as a coach it’s important for me to remember that though exercising every day or eating a clean diet has become second nature for me, this is not everybody. People have insecurities about exercise, they feel discriminated against because of their age, sex or weight and they feel embarrassed about their own abilities in comparison to other people.
“Forget everybody else!” do what you love doing and make the changes you need to make, in order to be the best that you can be.
Let’s discuss disappointment for a moment. Disappointment is what you find in the gap between expectation and reality. To avoid disappointment we have to come to grips with where we are now, not sugar coat our situations or believe we are without fault. At the end of the day we are all with faults, which is why we are continually searching for self-improvement. We exercise to become fitter, faster and stronger. We study to become smarter and wiser and we seek the guidance of professionals to continue to take steps forward.
In my industry I have found many people to be apprehensive about taking part in coaching sessions with people half their age or those that look more athletic. At the end of the day this shouldn’t be a reason to not exercise or to strive to be better as they are here for the same reason you are, to be a better version of what they were yesterday. Yes some of us may be very unco-ordinated, not know our lefts from our rights, BUT, we all have our strengths, we can’t be great at everything but we can improve those things that we aren’t good at through our will, and a drive to be something more.
Sure things don’t always go as planned and a lot of the time our expectations get punched in the face by reality, but it’s what we do with these failed experiences that help us define the next steps we take.
Let’s do an expectations vs reality scenario as an example. “The First Kiss”
In your head you imagine your first kiss to somewhere remote and alone, sitting on a picnic blanket under a sea of stars, chatting and drinking coffee waiting for the sun to come up. You're both nervous because this is the first time you have been so close together and this is going to be the first time that you’ll kiss. You both lean in, arms wrapped tightly around each other and you can both feel each other’s heart’s beating.
The wind blows softly, you both shiver a bit and giggle. You lean in, you kiss! IT’S MAGICAL!
Its 3am and you're both in a crowded, smelly, noisy bar with a sticky floor. You’ve been drinking way too many coloured cocktails and cowboy shots. Your half sitting half falling over a wet table, full of empty bottles and soggy food no one is game enough to pick at. You're eye sight is a little woozy but in your mind you're fine, straight as an arrow.
You bump into someone on the dance floor and start grinding not even knowing what they look like, suddenly they turn and for a while you sway and stare at into each other’s eyes. You can barely feel your cheeks, you both lean in, there’s a head clash but you're both too hammered to care. The kiss is wet, sloppy and messy BUT, ITS MAGICAL (or at least in your head it is)
So here’s my point, even though sometimes events don’t meet your expectations the reality may have been just as effective or great, or in this case magical. Forget all of your inhibition’s and don’t lose sight of what’s truly important.
It’s not important that you’re the only one who can’t squat their body weight in a session, the fact is you’re squatting. So what if you can’t do a chin up without help, you’re chin upping, and big deal if you do push-ups on your knees, YOU ARE DOING PUSH UPS.
Get out there and be great regardless of your age, sex, or abilities!